Monday, October 30, 2006

Only in Texas

As we approached the departure gate for our (wrong) flight, you could hear a buzz of excited chat like a passing squad of colourfully-clad French cyclists.
Which I suppose it almost was in a way. The whole of the rest of the passenger load was taken up by aging Texan couples festooned in the iconography of Harley Davidson: HD T-shirts, HD sweatshirts, HD bomber jackets and, of course, HD baseball caps. I presume their nightwear is similarly emblazoned.
I keep expecting to hear a horde of hired Harleys hubble-bubbling along the coast road, but they haven’t appeared so far. Probably still looking for their luggage - (American Airlines this time, not BA).

Talking about Texas, I know everything’s bigger there, but I think this is a commode too far. It's about the Great John Toilet Company of Loredo - I see they’re advertising ‘the ultimate WC for modern Americans’. It has 150% more contact area on the seat, an extra wide base to prevent tipping, ‘unique side wings (whatever they are) to prevent pinching’. And here's the killer: it supports loads up to 2,000lbs, or 143 stone. I like that 'no tipping' - I never do except in France, where you have to.

Which reminds me, if anyone in the US is reading this, Delta are running a competition, the prize for which is a round trip JFK/Nice. Here’s the link. Good luck.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm in on teh contest, out on the HArleys.
THere are so many people here in TExas that enjoy 'riding their hogs' that it's a weekend sport. Most of them don't belong on motorcylces in traffic. Riding a Harley doesn't really giv eyou any more cache than you would have had already.

This is all Malcom Forbes' fault.

Anonymous said...

Or Ken Kesey's!

And when were you in Texas?! And you didn't look me up!

Anonymous said...

Kesey sounds like someone I'd like to have met. Not sure about Malcolm - though once did a trip on Highlander (just before it got burned up).
Wouldn't think of not looking you up - got rellies in west Texas but haven't seen most of them in 30 years.